For Eric Segal and Kate - where ever they may be

At the tender age of eleven, with my best friend Lori, I went to see the movie "Love Story". For those of you old enough to remember this cinematic gem, the tag line of the movie was "Love Means Never Having to Say You are Sorry". I never thought about it much at the time - after all I was eleven and you could argue why would any parent let their eleven year old see that film. It was 1970 though, before the age of hyper-parenting and in those days we all played outside all day without telling Mom and Dad where we were every minute. Anyway, I digress.

Forty years later, in the middle of the night, I awoke to realize that what Eric Segal was really saying was that love means saying you are sorry again and again and making sure you are doing it in the moment if possible. I may now hold the world's record for the most time between seeing a movie and understanding its meaning. At this rate, I will need to live to be 90 to understand "Inception".Why, might you ask is this important especially at 3 a.m. on a workday?

Last night, I had a bad parenting moment. Instead of just cutting my losses and saying I was sorry, I argued and argued. My challenger was a formidable opponent - my sixteen year old daughter, Kate. Anyone who has parented a teenage girl knows that unlike a teenage boy who will sulk and ignore you, a girl is willing to take you to the mat. A innocent remark sparked the argument and soon I was determined to have her fully understand the loss I had felt as her father and I worked through the divorce process. When I finally regained my senses I knew I had said too much and even a trip into her favorite Italian bakery would not heal the situation that night. The good news is that I am learning and growing from things like this and next time when I am tired and cranky I will think twice about making sure everyone around me knows exactly how I feel. Eric, as you look down upon me from writer's heaven, be proud to know for this reader, the synapse has finally closed.